那时候OICQ风行祖国大地，全民都在上网聊天。我也赶潮流开聊，结果不知不觉聊上了瘾，经常是半夜三更不睡觉跟几个MM聊得天昏地暗，刚娶过来的老婆敢怒不敢言。最后是我老爸实在看不过去，得个机会把我臭骂了一顿，我这才猛醒。从此再也不上OICQ了。
想跟你说的是，人都有犯错的时候，有的错误可以弥补，不妨给个机会。该怎么做你自己看着办。别一有事就叫嚣着离婚。当然如果你早就看你老婆不顺眼，那就另当别论了。

你妻子是不该瞒着你那样胡乱聊，不过如果你是爱她的就该想办法帮助她“回头”，要知道人是脆弱的、都有可能犯错误。你该坦白的“关心”她、而不是“斥责”她——因为那样会适得其反。那样的话，她会因为舍不得让你难过而自律的。

让她知道你不能容忍她和那个老外过分亲密的话语。注意谈时要冷静，宽容而客观。祝你们幸福。

放宽心，对于每一个到这里的人，第一年都是most tough 的。熬过去了就就是海阔天空，有时候女人是很单纯的，多和您太太聊聊，大气些，我们都是大老爷们嘛。小弟还没有结婚，没什么经验，但是觉得既然你们都有孩子了，一定要好好珍惜现在的一切啊老兄。
别听那些S人在这里胡扯八道，我相信你太太没什么。

很感谢大家的热心帮助。
可能我是太冲动了，我相信我们能妥善解决这件事的。
我们昨天已经谈了一次。事实上我从上海回来后她就曾经告诉过我这件事，当时我并没太在意，我想她应该有一些自己的空间，我不想过分干涉她。我也知道两个人见过几次面（当然是在我回来之前）。两人之间应该是没有发生过过分的事情。当然the guy肯定是会有一些想法的，只不过我太太觉得他（男人）还比较坦诚，而且她自己也确实贪玩了一些。她是害怕他们的一些不良的谈话记录和事情被我发觉而引起我的猜疑。
事实上我并不是排斥她上网聊天，只是这次走得有点远，而且大家之间有了些误解，可能还是沟通不够。现在我想我太太应该已经知道了我的想法以及此事可能会产生的严重后果。
本来我并不想完全中止他们这种关系，因为他确实帮过我们，而我们某种程度上也是在利用人家。但考虑到大家的建议，这种事情可能确实太难控制，因此我和太太讨论后决定和the guy讲明一切，结束一切。相信我们能处理好这件事情。
再次感谢大家的热情帮助。也祝大家家庭生活幸福，平安。希望未成家者早日找到自己的幸福生活。谢谢！

要珍惜，但一切随缘，实在很痛苦，可能她也不会高兴。
其实根本是看你是否在乎她。如果在乎，你会努力的。

Reminding you here it has more freedom for woman. And also more temptation. Women are easier to fit here and attracted by the change. Your wife is curious, it is normal. But it is dangerous. Ask her think about your relationship more deeply. Ask her opinion about it and her feeling. If she needs some changes, just open your mind to accept or adjust your life. I do not think she want to leave you. She may want you make some change for the new life. Let her know you value her and your kids as family that is why you want her more focus on the family life.

The problem in most Chinese men I guess is too worry and has too many pressure and lack of romantic. They are always burning out by life, even good life, not really enjoy it. On the opposite, the problem of most women is too naive about life; always want to pursue easy life.

You can try to bring her to church, make friends there, it will fill her empty and soften her heart. Even you do not believe it. Wait and see the effect by yourself.

But if I were you, I would not divoice even if she have sex with the foreigner, as long as she do not want to divoice and you have a child. You can have your own sex partener too if you don't mind. But there much more things important than sex